Routine and Mood Swings

I will admit that one of my biggest Type A, OCD tendencies is that I am VERY routine based. I can remember this pattern dating back to high school and it causing problems in personal relationships. The bottom line is that I know what works best for me so I like to repeat it. Being routine based can be both a pro and con.

The positive is that it enables me to tackle of variety of issues because it simplifies things. I sometimes wish I could be one of those people who live on a whim...but I am not. My life is all about "To-do" lists. This helps me stay focused. When the weekend comes, I sometimes feel overwhelmed until I quantify things. Then I gain a sense of accomplishment as I mark things off. In the end, a routine gives me a sense of balance in life.

The downside is that a routine based lifestyle leaves you very rigid. I tend to stay high strung a bit more than I desire. But more importantly, when a wrench is thrown into my routine, I become very crabby and moody. I seriously think it alters the equilibrium within.

When it comes to triathlon, I often tell beginners that YOU are your only deterrent in the sport. The key to the sport is consistency. You need consistency day in day out; week after week. Most beginners never adopt a routine and randomly go about the sport. This is exactly where the sport becomes a perfect fit for my personality mold. I know what my workouts are for the week. I know that Wednesday is bike intervals, Friday is long swim, etc. This helps me plan the rest of my week.

This week provided a significant challenge to my routine. Work was quite hectic and the thought of only a 40 hour work week sounded like the greatest idea in the world. Typical 8-9 hour days were being stretched to 10-11 hour days. I was in earlier and leaving later. This pattern completely disrupted my routine. To make matters worse, it threw off my feeding pattern. And I am DEFINITELY a creature of habit when it comes to eating.

What resulted was a very crabby and moody mindset. By Wednesday night, I was in a really foul mood. I walked into my house at 8:30 and still had to get on the trainer. I found myself eating dinner at 9:45. This isn't my routine and definitely not one that I want to see repeated.

The thing about a routine is that they are incredibly difficult to start and they take focus nearly every day to become habit. However, they are so EASY to break. Then you have to start the cycle over. My concern was that work was completely disrupting my routine.

I spent most of Wednesday night focusing on I COULD do over the next few days to channel more positive energy into the situation. What I realized was that the break in my routine resulted in one of the biggest personal violations....neglecting myself. I value time to myself. Some would say I vaule it too much, but that is an entry on a different blog. :) As mentioned above, my routine brings calmness and simplicity to my life. I realized that I wasn't getting any me time.

I tend to quantify me time during three points in the day. The first and most important time is in the morning before work. It is that 30 minutes after waking up. I don't drink coffee or read the paper but it's the equivalent of that stereotype. The second is during lunch. I eat in my office 90% of the time and it provides me the opportunity to reflect on the morning and refocus on the afternoon/evening tasks. Finally, it is the 20 minutes after a workout when I am cooling down or just lying on the floor.

So Thursday I set out with the task of finding that equilibrium. I woke up early and despite knowing the hectic day was ahead, I tried to relax and remind myself that the sun will rise even if the people at work think the sky is falling. I took 20 minutes to do some basic yoga to get the blood flowing. And then I spent the next 30 minutes watching Sunrise Earth. This is something that I probably never realized impacted me as much as it does. But I find it VERY tranquil and relaxing. I even took my blackberry to the car so that I wouldn't hear it buzzing. That morning I arrived to work in such a calm and relaxed mood. The stress of the day didn't bother me. I went home relaxed and had a good workout. I found that balance.

Moving forward I need to spend more time capturing these moments. For instance, I decided to not race this weekend. I know athletically racing this weekend would be in my best interest. It would likely bring me more success next month. However, it wasn't striking a balance in my life. I didn't like the prospect of spending 10 hours in the car when it is sunny and 70. Instead, I opted to stay home. This weekend will hopefully provide me with an opportunity to get outdoors as much as possible. I will be able to train outside (a routine I miss) and spend some time around the house taking care of things that need to be done. Most importantly, I will focus on myself this weekend.

My to-do list is growing by the moment. I won't accomplish everything. Instead, I will focus on what I CAN do and what will maximize my happiness. And at the end of Sunday, I hope to sit down for dinner with a sense of relief....relief that training IS on target for NOLA, relief that I accomplished a number of things over the weekend, relief that I found equilibrium and will start next week fresh and with a better attitude about things.